Anonymous asked: I have been in a faux-relationship for 6 months- the highest of highs, the lowest of lows type. After a disagreement, he texted he needed space. I want to tell him I don't want to be in this relationship anymore & I can't be just friends with him, either (which I know he wants). I've been dumped by e-mail before so I'd prefer to do it in person but I also don't want to wait around for him to contact me. I also don't want to sound passive aggressive. Do you have a strategy recommendation?
I commend you on wanting to end it in person. Rare chutzpah.
Call him. If he answers, tell him you’d like to meet with him in person (coffee, his place, the TGI Fridays parking lot, wherever you have an exit.) If he agrees, great. If he won’t meet, end it while you’re still on the phone. Be succinct and clear. ” I don’t want to be in this relationship anymore, and I can’t be just friends. You’ve meant a lot to me, but this is what I want.”
Assuming the call goes to voicemail, leave a message like, “hey, call me back when you get a chance.” Try to avoid saying, “we need to talk,” because even typing that gives me the heebie-jeebies.
Whatever you do, avoid text messages at all costs. They’re so base, and on top of that, they give people too much room for interpretation, forwarding, anxiety, and all the other implications of the written word.
Or you could be a jackass and reply to his text saying he needs space and just type _______________ and ask if that’s enough. Because who the hell texts they need space? Be a grown up, for science’s sake.
