Anonymous asked: Any advice on patience for Bold Moves? My move is career related, but I'm not in a position where I can just switch jobs. So changing within my job is going to take FOREVER. But it's my only option currently.
I did a take on Gretchen Rubin’s Happiness Commandments, and one of the things I focused on was the idea of a forest from a seed. Having patience is not only a virtue, it’s a god damn miracle these days. We get everything we want at the touch of a button, but there are still things in life that take time and development and consideration and planning, and MAN does that drive us nuts. But you need to commend yourself on the smaller steps that make for a big change: resume updates, networking emails, content development, etc., etc.
To feel like you’re accomplishing more, break down your list of to-dos in smaller bits. Instead of “update resume” being a blanket item, break it into items like “edit language on resume,” “format aesthetically,” “send to friends to review,” “post to LinkedIn,” “reserve personal URL,” “research blog platforms,” you get the idea. Small steps to a big platform.
2:45 pm • 8 October 2013 • 22 notes
Anonymous asked: lately i've been that girl girl who will stay up and answer texts from a guy i like... at 2am, even though it's obviously a booty call... and let him come sleep over. my bold move this month will be having more self respect, putting my phone on silent, and just going to bed. if a guy wants to see me, it'll have to be during normal hours.
I love this rule not only for dating, but for work. I’m not a doctor. If I don’t answer an email at 1 am, no one is going to die. You don’t always have to be available to people. And likewise, they don’t always need to be available to you.
Respect your time because no one else will.
2:29 pm • 8 October 2013 • 48 notes
Anonymous asked: I've been involved with a guy for a year now who has had a girl friend the entire time. It's a long drawn out situation, which also involves him being my best friend and boss and so out of sight out of mind hasnt been possible. It's been such habit over the past year to rely on him to make me feel wanted and good about myself. My bold move this month is showing myself more self respect and cutting off our physical relationship, 1 week strong. I need to break the habit once and for all. thankyou
I love this. Good on you, babe.
7:32 pm • 7 October 2013 • 18 notes
ajpeacey asked: I'm really intrigued! Who is this new guy, and where did you find him? You go girl! x
When I was moving here, a friend of mine had someone in mind for me. But she didn’t want to set me up until my heart was a bit mended, a bit less ruthless. She showed me his FB profile. And she showed him mine. We were waiting on her.
I downloaded Tinder, and he popped up. I swiped left, deleting him, because my friend would introduce us eventually. The next week, he popped up on Tinder again. Swipe left. A couple days after that, he came up on my visitors list on OkCupid, each of us with different profile photos from Tinder.
The day after that, he sent me a FB message. “Hey! I figured I should just say hello rather than continue to feel awkward about running into you on dating apps when I think we both know who each other are. Either way, welcome! We should grab a friendly coffee or beer or something sometime.”
It’s been three weeks since then, and there have been maybe four days we haven’t seen each other.
So, that’s 104. He’s kind and he’s handsome and he makes me laugh.
I don’t know, man. I’m just holding my breath.
6:57 pm • 7 October 2013 • 65 notes
reaganing asked: I applied for my dream job earlier this month and haven't heard back from them (I even sent a follow-up last week). Out of the blue, an old friend emailed me, and I found out she works at the HQ of this dream job, in almost the exact position I want. She's scheduled me to come to her office as a participant in a study, and she's introducing me to her boss, who is in charge of hiring for the position I applied for. I want to make a good impression but have no idea what to do! Bold Moves advice?
I hope you told her you applied! Work those connections…ask your friend if she could help set up an informational interview. You want face time with this boss, not just a hello. Bring your resume, dress to impress, and per usual, come with the two most important things: questions and enthusiasm.
Go get ‘em!
6:18 pm • 7 October 2013 • 17 notes
meredithbklyn asked: you gotta send me a link to your (spotify?) playlist! i couldn't find it :/ also also, yesterday one of my BFFs broke up with a guy she had been with 3+ years because he was getting ready to propose and she knew she couldn't. I immed sent her links to some of your posts and a BMO link, and let her know she had already started BMO even if she didn't know it! so, thx for that. she's the bravest person I know right now. xxo
That’s an intense and amazing and thoughtful bold move. Goodness gracious.
As for the playlist…
5:57 pm • 7 October 2013 • 10 notes
I moved into my new place this weekend. It’s an itty bitty studio a few blocks from the beach.
And for the first time in a long time, someone bought me flowers. After he spent all day moving all my stuff.
He also brought over action movies, snacks, and orange soda, because he is awesome.
As Usher would say, “you got it, you got it bad.”
I do, Usher. I do.
4:23 pm • 7 October 2013 • 90 notes
Be Bold: say no
Sometimes in order to make room for joy, you need to say no to something else.
- “No, I won’t be able to get this done today. I can send it to you tomorrow.”
- “No, I’m not interested. Have a nice day.”
- “No, I won’t be able to make it. I hope you have a lovely time!”
"Just say no" would’ve been a much more constructive PSA for life than drugs. The work will get done, the party will go on. It’s much more destructive to say yes and disappoint someone later. Say no!
Now, look again at those examples I provided. Because if you’re having trouble with saying no, they offer a helpful tip: say no and then say a thought-closer. They don’t finish with an apology or an explanation, but rather a means to ending the ask.
When you respect your self and your time, people around you will learn to do the same.
1:33 pm • 7 October 2013 • 91 notes
ellesaboo asked: I thought my bold move was going to be really letting myself be vulnerable and reconnect with an old flame but I ended up pushing him away again when we were starting to get really close. I'm beyond disappointed but I guess my new bold move will be to try to let my heart fully heal this time and really move on. I'm terrified but I guess it's time.
Bold Moves come in all forms.
8:51 pm • 4 October 2013 • 4 notes
Anonymous asked: My bold move is to move on, I had a brief but lovely relationship and it ended and I've been sulking over it for a while now and my friends have left me in the dust as well. But I'm going to start taking care of myself (mind, body, and spirit) and move on to be the best me I've ever been.
I mean, hey, it’s the weekend, no better time to be the best you.
8:26 pm • 4 October 2013 • 8 notes